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Dead Inside: They tried to break me. This is the true story of how I survived.
Download Ebook Dead Inside: They tried to break me. This is the true story of how I survived.
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Review
"Etler channels her younger self's voice with pitch-perfect verisimilitude as Cyndy goes from wide-eyed disbelief to acquiescence, having finally found a place where she feels like she belongs. An epilogue offers a redemptive conclusion, and an author's note provides chilling context for Straight's history and Cyndy's story. Raw and absorbing, Etler's voice captivates. " - Kirkus"Etler weaves her story with conviction, self-deprecating humor, and hard facts... Readers will come to respect the fighter that Etler is and the advocate she became for other teens in similar situations." - Booklist"[An] unnerving and heartrending memoir... readers may be stunned that a place like Straight could exist, let alone that a parent would willingly send a child there." - -Etler channels her younger self's voice with pitch-perfect verisimilitude as Cyndy goes from wide-eyed disbelief to acquiescence, having finally found a place where she feels like she belongs. An epilogue offers a redemptive conclusion, and an author's note provides chilling context for Straight's history and Cyndy's story. Raw and absorbing, Etler's voice captivates. - - Kirkus-Etler weaves her story with conviction, self-deprecating humor, and hard facts... Readers will come to respect the fighter that Etler is and the advocate she became for other teens in similar situations.- - Booklist-[An] unnerving and heartrending memoir... readers may be stunned that a place like Straight could exist, let alone that a parent would willingly send a child there.- -
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Product details
Paperback: 320 pages
Publisher: Sourcebooks Fire; Reprint edition (March 6, 2018)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1492652792
ISBN-13: 978-1492652793
Product Dimensions:
5.5 x 1 x 8.2 inches
Shipping Weight: 9.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.5 out of 5 stars
46 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#557,277 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
I read The Dead Inside first (before "We Can't be Friends") and it absolutely changed my decision about sending my troubled teen to boarding school. I kept seeing the link for her books pop up when I was researching therapeutic boarding schools and I'm so glad that I looped back and read both of Ms. Etler's books. The Dead Inside is a personal tale of triumph which gave me tremendous hope as I navigate the way forward in my own family. She exposes a former corner of the troubled teen industry where she was wrongly accused/diagnosed as an addict and held hostage at a time when she should have been back in school and picking out prom dresses. Her home life was abysmal so on some level you'd think that maybe getting away from home would be a good thing, but she was clearly stuck in hell no matter which way she turned.It's easy to close this book and say "well, that whole situation was truly awful and abusive, but it was the 80s, things are different now, we're smarter, we know more, we wouldn't let that happen..." except that assumption is simply NOT TRUE! The same kind of abuse still happens at "therapeutic" boarding schools around the country every single day, and it's not just the ones that low income kids get sent to - it's also the ones that cost $70K+ a year. A dive into Reddit made me realize that no matter how tricky and difficult life is at home, shipping our teen off to be reprogrammed isn't an option. Please read this book if you're at the end of your wits and feeling hopeless as a parent or as a teen. It gives much needed perspective into the very murky troubled teen industry. Sadly, so many of the very places we think exist to help and nurture and refocus our kids are the very places that break them down, trounce their spirits, and make them more prone to addiction, depression, abuse, self harm and suicide when they emerge on the other side. Don't believe the pretty pictures you see on websites - dig into Reddit and you'll come to the same sad conclusions.
Miss Etler is totally accurate in her description of Straight Inc.She presents the horrors that occurred there in a vivid and true portrayal of what it was like to be a teenager in one of the most damaging, violent, "soul breaking" rehabs that America has seen.This book will astound anyone that read it... Especially those of us that were there.I did indeed feel as if I was "back on front row" while reading her very scary and very true book.The suffering we endured there carries through for a lifetime.This is a "must read" for anyone that was there.Also a "must read" for any parent considering putting their child in a similar program.They still exist today.
This book is a Godsend! Cindy put into words the horror of the experience. It is accurate to a spooky level. The emotions she describes are the same I and many other Straight Inc survivors experienced then & still experience to this day. This book has changed my life, allowing me to awaken to the horrors I experienced wihile a fellow survivor shares so vulnerably. I laughed inappropriately at things that were not a bit funny, but somehow I experienced relief seeing my horrirs in the written word. This is a very true story. Thank you Cindy Etler!
You won't be sorry you took the spiral dive into Cyndy Etler's predatory home life and involuntary captivity in a teen mind control cult, where only insanity assured survival. Cruel truth, thriller pacing, and immersive description make 'The Dead Inside' a fast, engrossing, emotional must read.Ms. Etler writes with absolute authority on Straight, Inc.'s brainwashing and intimidation tactics that turned so many formative teen minds against themselves. Her angsty youthful narrative voice careens you through the: shock, panic, terror, and psychotic submission necessary to survive the abuse of such environments.Having suffered captivity and deprivation under different circumstances, I found the universal truth of Cyndy's experience undeniable. I would have liked more about life and recovery post Straight, Inc., but hope to find it in some form in her future works. I only make the time to review material that merits 5-stars. I read this book twice and appreciated it both times. I'll be reading more by Cyndy Drew Etler in the future.Soaring with keen eyes and sharp talons, 'The Dead Inside' is a screaming eagle among YA memoirs.
Buckle up, it's going to be one hell of a ride. The gravity of the material in Etler's book grabs you page one and doesn't let up until the very end. The ups and downs, her emotions, are raw and real. As you're reading, you feel yourself transforming into a kid, wearing Levi's. You're there, you're with her. You hear the music climbing. Your heart beats faster when her heart beats faster. It's the most relatable book I've read in a long time, not because I can relate, but because she made me relate. Do yourself a favor, buy the book.
The Dead Inside by Cyndy Etler is a fast paced, gripping read, one that I devoured in a day and a half. You will feel as if you have known her all of your life (from the very first page) while you are walking by her side through her very sad journey, but unable to take her hand.No one should have to endure this in their lifetime, especially a child, but the encouragement and life lessons that she describes should be read by all-especially younger teens as they are about to embark on those very difficult years. Parents of teens or soon to be teens should absolutely have The Dead Inside in their arsenal as well.Cyndy Etler had the bravery to expose all of the details that went on in her difficult younger life so that others will not only learn by it, but hopefully save other children from the same darkness.
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